just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
