haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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