THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
