I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize