Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
