It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize