She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
