The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
