the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
