i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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