sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I need water and some morals
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize