So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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