You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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