I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize