I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
