I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize