You're my little dorito
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
