doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
What drink are we having for lunch?
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
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