maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
