you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
