What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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