planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
