my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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