Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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