I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
it's like iHOP with fire
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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