She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
zippers are such a cool invention
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
