I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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