YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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