You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
