like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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