he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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