Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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