Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I have so many feelings about this burrito
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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