This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize
