Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
how drunk are you?
Several
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
