brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
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