I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
