the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
