Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize