How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Randomize
