Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
