More tranny stories later!
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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