is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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