She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize
