If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Sorry about my life...
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
