Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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