just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
