somebody snuck up and got me drunk
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
