I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
