hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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