Ambien. No doubt about it.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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