worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
It's no shave November. This is our time.
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